


Something Old

by Tea_For_One



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Everybody Ships It, Highschool AU, M/M, Popular!Dean, They like each other but are both emotionally constipated, nerd!cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 12:09:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 17,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8713285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tea_For_One/pseuds/Tea_For_One
Summary: Castiel does not like Dean Winchester. But it's not like it was Dean's fault, Cas was the one who fell in love with him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I originally posted this on Wattpad as my second fanfiction ever but decided to spread it here. Enjoy I guess.

"You 'like like' him don't you!" She yelled in a teasing voice. He shoved her. 

"Shut up Charlie!" The redhead laughed. 

"Why don't you just talk to him?" He pushed her again. "Shh! Or someone's gonna hear you!" He yelled at her. She giggled. He moved in close. 

"Plus, guys aren't supposed to like guys." 

She scowled at him. "People can love who they want and you know that. Don't ever think you can't like someone just because they are the same gender as you." 

Cas cursed himself for bringing up gay rights in a conversation with Charlie. "You're right. But I'm not gonna talk to him. I'm 13, I don't need to be in a relationship." 

But I can still hope. He thought. 

"Yeah, I guess you're right." She sighed and rested her chin on her hands. "That Gilda girl is nice, though. You should ask her out." He decided to change the subject. Her face lit up at the mention of the name. 

He sat listening to his best friend gush on and on about her crush, hope blossoming in his chest.

The next month was the Halloween dance for Angel Valley Middle School. Cas was not asked to that dance. He instead stood in a corner listening to crappy music while his bouncy red headed best friend stared at the door waiting for Gilda to show up. 

Charlie saw his solemn expression and just bumped his shoulder. "I'm sure he'll ask you next time." He nodded sadly. Her eyes went back to the doors of the gym. 

He watched the redhead brighten up at the sight of her girlfriend. She took Gilda's hand, and began dancing with her. 

Maybe next time, he thought, maybe next time I'll get something like that. 

He was in zombie mode leading up to the Christmas dance. Days droned on and on, same schedule, repeating over and over again. A test here, an assignment there. 

School had always been easy for him, the work didn't really matter to him. He had always been a straight A student. The routine didn't bother him either, order was nice, it just got boring. 

But when December rolled around, he grew excited. There had been gossip Dean was going to ask someone to the dance. When the event did come come around though, Cas was sitting alone, watching Dean Winchester dance with Lisa Braeden, and he swore to himself, that he would never fall in love with Dean again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Castiel's first day of high school, and he already hates it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what to write here, I'm new here.

Okay, here goes. 

Cas pushed the door to the school open. He looked down to his notebook. Locker #348. Okay. 

He walked down the hall counting the lockers. 345, 346, 347, 348. He tried out his combination, luckily it worked. 

Cas was in the middle of putting his books into the locker when Charlie jumped up beside him. 

"Heya Cassie!" She yelled. He recoiled from the loud volume of her voice. "Jesus Charlie, don't do that! And I told you to stop calling me Cassie!" She just smiled at him. 

"You know you love me." He rolled his eyes and went back to his locker. He slammed the door shut once his books were inside and turned back to his best friend. 

"How you holding up?" He asked. She smiled sadly and flipped her red hair from her face. "I'm okay, it was for the best anyway. Long distance wouldn't have worked all that well." Cas put a hand on her arm. "It's okay to be sad, but I'm glad you're doing alright." She nodded. 

"Excuse me," A voice came from behind Charlie. "Can I get to my locker?" He knew that voice. Charlie stepped aside to reveal Dean Winchester.

"Sorry." She said, shocked. He just waved a hand at her. "Don't worry about it, you're fine." She looked wordlessly as Cas' ex-crush moved to open locker #349. Cas just grabbed his backpack and started to walk away, white faced. He heard her hurried footsteps behind him. 

"That is one shit locker arrangement." She spoke quietly, her eyes wide. "You think?" He replied with poison in his voice. Why am I angry? 

"Of all the lockers in this god damn school..." He muttered under his breath. 

A shrill noise echoed through the hall. "What's your first period?" She asked him, trying to lighten the mood. 

"English." He said, seeming more calm. 

"Aw lucky, I have math." She waved at him. "See ya Cassie!"

"IT'S CAS!"

———

He sat down in the front of the room, glad he didn't have to figure out a seating chart on the first day. 

"Hello Cassie." It was Balthazar. 

"For god's sake can you two stop calling me that!" He just chuckled. 

Balthazar sat in the seat next to Castiel. "So, how was your summer?" Cas just shrugged. 

"Boring for the most part. I didn't really do anything, except hang out with you and Charlie." Balthazar's smile turned into a thin line at the name. 

"How is she doing? New York is pretty far away." 

"She said she's okay, but you don't just get over your girlfriend of two years moving hundreds of miles away." He finished just as the bell rang. 

A short, dark haired woman walked into the room. "Alright, everyone shut up and sit down." The class settled down and she nodded her head. 

"I'm Ms. Robinson, and no, I don't have a time traveling son." Quiet laughs echoed in the room. She continued. 

"Most teachers make a PowerPoint or play a game telling the students about themselves, but I don't really care." Silence. 

"Instead, I'm going to take roll. Please raise your hand and say 'here' when I call your name." The teacher began reciting names off a sheet. 

"Balthazar Colton." Balthazar raised his hand and said "Yo." The teacher rolled her eyes and kept calling out names, but her voice faded out into the background as Cas spaced out. 

This happened quite often, and it annoyed his friends, but he saw it as a good way to pass the time. 

"Hannah Grace." A girl with startling blue eyes and brown hair raised her hand. "Here." She said in a soft voice. 

"Fergus McCloude?" The class laughed. A short black haired kid raised his hand with a scowl and said, "It's Crowley." She nodded and marked something on her paper. 

"Meg Masters." A girl chewing gum and clad in leather lifted her hand boredly and lamely stated, "Here."

"Castiel Novak." His hand shot up and he practically yelled "Present!" The teacher looked up. "Well at least someone's excited to be here." The class laughed again while Cas blushed. 

His hand dropped and he thunked his head on his desk. Balthazar patted his back. "First day nerves still get to you, huh?" He just groaned. 

He spent the rest of the role call with his head on his desk, his arms blocking out the light of the classroom. He was starting to think he could just spend the rest of the period like this when Ms. Robinson clapped loudly right next to his ear. 

He shot up, blue eyes widened. He heard the class laughing behind him. Great, I've now embarrassed myself two times on the first day of high school. 

"What's your name?" Ms. Robinson asked. "Uh, Castiel." She snapped her fingers and turned. "Right, Castiel. Weird name. I promise to try and get all your names."

He looked at Balthazar, who was suppressing laughter. Cas smacked his arm, which made him release the laughter. Cas glared at him. 

"Your face." He said while chuckling quietly. Ms. Robinson snapped her fingers. "Listen." Now that the whole class was attention was on the teacher, she started to speak. 

"Class rules." They all groaned. "Don't talk while I'm talking." She shot a glare at Cas and Balthazar. "Turn your assignments in on time. And no sleeping in class." She specifically stared at Cas, who shrunk back. 

She clapped her hands. "Now that that's settled, let's watch a movie." Cas zoned out again. The movie was something about dolphins. 

His mind was wandering. What's it going to be like having a locker next to Dean? He tried to shake the question out of his head. I'm not going through that again. The shrill bell cut through his thoughts. 

He gathered up his things and walked out of the classroom. 

Time for the routine to start again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Mr. Winchester, I'm sure the back of Castiel's head is interesting, but I'd appreciate it if you'd look at me right now." Cas flushed and turned to Dean, who was blushing as well.

Cas had only made it through two periods and he was already exhausted. He made his way to homeroom. The halls were bustling with students all eager to get to their class, pushing and shoving through the crowd. He loathed crowded hallways. 

He made it to a doorway with 'Mr. Cobble' written above in big block letters. This is it. 

He was dismayed to find the room full of students, talking and horsing around. The only seats available were in the back where all the rowdy popular people sat. 

Since Cas was considered a 'nerd' he didn't really hang out with the popular crowd, he found them loud and pretentious. He had no desire to be like them, much less sit near them. But he wasn't about to ask someone if he could take their seat, so he made sure to sit as far away from the rowdy crowd as he could. 

It was just his luck when a smirking Dean Winchester strolled into the room, heading straight for the back of the room.

Great. Just fucking wonderful. He's my locker neighbor and he's in my homeroom. Please, just kill me now. 

His head was racing, this whole 'you can just ignore him' plan is falling apart real fucking fast. 

And of course had to choose to sit right next to Cas. His brain was just screaming WHYYYY? 

"Hey." Cas melted. NO, you're over him. Remember what happened. But no matter what he thought, he couldn't stop the stutter in his voice. 

"H-hello."

"It's Castiel right?" Holy shit. He knows my name? Of course he knows your name idiot, you were in the same 6th grade class. 

"Yeah." Fortunately the bell saved Cas from any further conversation. Mr. Cobble calmed down the chattering. Cas tried to pay attention to the class rules but he could see Dean staring at him from the corner of his eye. 

One quick glance in that direction confirmed that Dean was, indeed, staring at him. Cas looked forward again, but he could feel heat rising to his face.

He tried to listen to the teacher droning on about gum, but he could still feel Dean's eyes on him. He turned his blue eyes back to Dean. 

"What?" He whispered, somewhat icily. Dean looked to the front of the room. "Nothing." Cas rolled his eyes and looked back to Mr. Cobble, who was now telling a story about his old college professor. 

———

Cas was relieved to see Charlie in his fourth period class. "Oh thank god." She smiled. "Hey Cas, what's up?"

"So much." She leaned forward in her seat. "Ooooh, spill." He slumped into the seat beside her. "Later." She made a pouty face. 

He rolled his eyes.

———

One more period, then lunch. 

He cheered himself on in his mind. Normally he loved school, but having to deal with people wasn't one of his strengths.

He pushed the door open to his AP history class. Sadly, he didn't see any of his friends. But there were still seats in the front left open. 

He felt himself zoning out again, but he didn't care. The bell snapped him out of his state. 

The teacher stood up from her chair and walked to the center of the room. She was wearing a Doctor Who t-shirt and a marvel lanyard. "Sup." She said. 

"I'm Ms. Jackson, and this is my pawn shop." The class giggled. She smirked and grabbed a clipboard from her desk. 

"Roll, for like, the millionth time today." She rolled her eyes. 

"Annie Bala." Castiel stayed quiet until he heard his name. 

"Cas-Casteel. Cas-Castiel! Castiel Novak!" He raised his hand boredly. 

"Here." She looked at him and marked something on her paper. 

"Did I say your name right?" He just nodded. "Right, moving on." She kept calling role until she made it to the very last person. 

"Dean Winchester?" Cas froze.

Shit. 

Shitshitshitshitshit. Two fucking classes? 

"Here." Dean's voice came from behind him. Right behind him. 

Shiiiiiiiit. Cas honestly couldn't think anything else right now. 

Ms. Jackson turned to a kid and handed them the roll. "Take that to the office." He nodded and walked out the door. 

"Right. Okay, freshies, welcome to high school. Things you should know is one: never knock on the door to the janitors closet if you hear noises. Two, never take a custodian's apple. And three-" She cut off as she looked behind Cas. 

"Mr. Winchester, I'm sure the back of Castiel's head is interesting, but I'd appreciate it if you'd look at me right now." Cas flushed and turned to Dean, who was blushing as well. 

He turned back around quickly and the teacher resumed her speech. 

"And three, Mr. Jenkins is super OCD, no matter how much he denies it." She looked back at the class. 

"Great! Now the we've got that out of the way let's start learning names!"

———

"How was school Cas?" His mother asked as he walked in the door. 

"Fine. Some of the teachers are insane though."

"Oh really? Tell me more." She put her elbows on the counter. 

He relayed his day to her, talking about his more... eccentric teachers, for lack of a better word. He was relieved when the conversation ended and he could go up to his room. 

He tossed his backpack on the floor and collapsed on his bed. He began to count the bumps on his ceiling when his phone buzzed by his side. 

Cas lazily grabbed his phone and read 2 new messages from Charlie. 

Received 2:20 PM  
You still haven't told me what happened. 

Received 2:20 PM  
A girl needs to know Cas

He smiled and sent a reply. 

Sent 2:21 PM  
Well, as it turns out, Dean is in two of my classes. FML 

His hand fell back down and he looked at the ceiling again. He phone buzzed again. 

Received 2:23 PM  
DUDE. R U SERIOUS?! Sucks to be you!

Sent 2:24 PM  
Yea I know. Whatever, I think I'm over him now. 

That's a lie and you know that. 

Received 2:24 PM  
We both know that's a lie. After how you acted this morning? Please. 

Well I guess she knows me pretty well then. She's my best friend for a reason. 

Sent 2:26 PM  
Yeah, okay, I may not be COMPLETELY over him, but I know better now. 

After all, I made a promise to myself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Did you just call me Cas?" Dean rubbed the back of his neck. 
> 
> "Uh, yeah. Castiel is kinda a mouthful. It's okay if I call you that right?" Cas nodded and unlocked the phone, hoping his blush wasn't visible to Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am finding that AO3 is my preferred medium for writing because there seems to be more interaction with your readers than on Wattpad... Oh well! Enjoy another chapter.

Cas sat in his fifth period class. He was already bored and the bell hadn't even rung yet. 

This past week had been... interesting to say the least. Charlie had been relentless in her texts lately saying things like: "MY OTP LIVES" and "THE SHIP HAS SET SAIL". 

Charlie was a born shipper. She was always telling him about her OTP's and various other ships, weirdly, most of them were gay. 

He and Charlie had accepted in their early teens they were both about as straight as a slinky. 

It wasn't too bad, they lived in a accepting town, and most people were kind. But that doesn't stop others from shoving Cas into a locker or throwing his backpack in the trash. 

Charlie didn't have it any better. Girls were constantly whispering around her and tripping her in the halls. 

Most people may be accepting, but there will always be assholes. 

The shrill sound of the bell shook him out of his thoughts and Dean Winchester took his seat right next to Cas'. 

Ms. Jackson moonwalked into the room wearing a pair of sunglasses match with a shirt that read 'I write sins not essays'. 

"Ayo peeps. Today I'm giving you your first project." They all groaned in unison. She rolled her eyes. "I know so exciting right?" She cleared her throat. 

"Okay. This project requires you all to have a partner." Everyone excitedly looked to their friends, but Cas, not having any friends in this class, boredly stared at the teacher. 

"Don't get too excited, I'm choosing your partners." The class 'awed' in response. 

"Okay so you will all be doing a creative project on one country, that's not America, obviously. I don't really care what you do just as long as it actually educates the class on your country. Once I tell you your partners and your country then you get together and plan your project. This is a pretty big project and it's due at the end of the term, so you'll have to exchange numbers so you can get work done at your houses. Ready? Break!"

She walked to her desk and grabbed a paper. 

"Maysie and Alex, you guys have Greece." Cas listened to her calling random names, wondering who he would end up with. 

Maybe I'll end up with Arthur. Or maybe Jack? 

"Castiel and Dean, you have Ireland."

Fuck. 

Dean turned to him. 

Fuck. 

"So..." Dean started. "Do you need my number?" Cas was setting himself on fire in his mind, but smiled and said, "Probably yes, considering I don't have it currently." 

What. The. Fuck. You are horrible at speaking. Don't even talk anymore, just nod. 

"Can I see your phone?" Cas nodded and reached into his backpack.

His phone case had Darth Vader on it and was captioned 'give me some space'. Dean chuckled when he saw it. 

"Star Wars. Awesome." 

What the hell does that mean? Does he think I'm just a nerd? 

Everyone knows you're a nerd, dumbass. 

But still. 

Cas nodded

Dean saved his phone number under a casual 'Dean'. He handed Cas' phone back to him and reached into his backpack. 

He pulled out a similar phone with just a solid black case. He held it out to Cas expectantly. 

Cas just stared at it. 

Dean shook it and waved a hand in front of his face. "Earth to Cas?" 

Cas shook his head and snapped out of it. "Sorry about that." He apologized and took Dean's phone, and paused. 

"Did you just call me Cas?" Dean rubbed the back of his neck. 

"Uh, yeah. Castiel is kinda a mouthful. It's okay if I call you that right?" Cas nodded and unlocked the phone, hoping his blush wasn't visible to Dean. 

The background was Connor from Assassin's Creed, not that Cas played that game before, as far as his mom knows. 

"Connor. Cool." 

I'm being just as cryptic as Dean is! Clarify yourself child!

"I mean, Assassin's creed is awesome, and fun. Three is my favorite, the storyline is super cool and oh god I can't stop talking help before I say something stupid." Dean laughed. 

"Yeah, I like it. Three is my favorite too." Cas tapped on contacts and began to put in his number. He handed it back to Dean smiling. 

"It's saved under 'Cas'." Dean chuckled and shoved his phone back into his backpack. 

"So, Ireland?" 

"Yep."

"I know nothing about Ireland."

"Me neither."

———

Cas came home to a large crash from the kitchen. He ran in to see his brother Gabriel sitting on the floor surrounded by pots and pans. 

"Jesus Gabe, what are you doing?" He helped his older brother up. 

"Well there's Cathy from the grocery store and then there's-" Cas covered his ears and shouted, "Ew! Gross Gabe! I meant why were you on the floor?"

"I was gunna make Mac n' Cheese but..." 

"But you're too short and couldn't reach the pans?" Castiel finished for him. 

"Yeah."

"Why are you making Mac n' Cheese?"

"Well mom's gone to a charity thing, Dad's on tour, and Anna's at college. Guess it's just me and you the whole weekend 'lil bro." He ruffled Cas' hair. 

"Yeah thanks, but I'd rather have food that isn't burnt and undercooked at the same time somehow." Cas grabbed a granola bar from the cabinet and walked up to his room. 

He took his laptop from his desk and opened it up. He typed 'Ireland' in the Google search bar and was halfway through the Wikipedia page when his phone went off with his text tone from Sherlock. 

"It's a text alert, it means I've got a text."

New message: Dean

He unlocked it and read the message. 

Received 3:30 PM  
Hey. R u doing the Ireland homework rn? I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing :/

Sent 3:33 PM  
Yeah, I am. I think we should just do research for now, and when Ms. Jackson gets more specific on what our content needs to be, then we can start on the actual project. 

Received 3:34 PM  
Ok cool

Another large crash sounded from the kitchen. 

Sent 3:36 PM  
Sorry, have to go. I need to make sure my brother didn't kill himself. 

Received 3:36 PM  
Good luck. 

Cas smiled at the text and ran down the stairs to see if Gabriel was alive.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas felt a pang of disappointment. Of course it was someone else, why on Earth would he take interest in someone as weird as me? How could I be so stupid?

Gabriel had been fine. The stupid cat just came from nowhere according to him. Cas rolled his eyes and walked back upstairs.

Sent 4:00 PM  
He's fine the cat just tripped him.

Received 4:02 PM  
you have a cat?

Sent 4:05 PM  
Yeah, his name is Two Face. I actually have two. The other's name is Frodo.

Received 4:07 PM  
Cool. But I'm allergic to cats so I've never had one :(

Sent 4:08 PM   
You live a hard ass life man.

Okay, so maybe it was a little weird that Cas was texting his ex-crush, but he's had to deal with so much bullshit lately, this is strangely normal.

Received 4:11 PM  
I didn't peg you the type for swearing lol

Sent 4:15 PM  
I try not to swear that often. That's a lie I swear all the time. I guess I'm just unpredictable. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Received 4:20 PM  
BLAZE IT. Sorry you were saying?

Sent 4:21 PM  
Wow. Just wow.

Received 4:25 PM  
hey

Sent 4:28 PM  
Yes?

Received 4:30 PM  
Do you have a map? Cuz I keep getting lost in ur eyes.

Cas blushed profusely.

What the hell? Was that a pick up line? But Dean is straight. What do I say to that?

Sent 4:38 PM  
?

Cas waited anxiously for the reply. Was Dean trying to hit on him?

Received 4:45 PM  
Sorry. Wrong person :P

Cas felt a pang of disappointment. Of course it was someone else, why on Earth would he take interest in someone as weird as me? How could I be so stupid? At this point Cas had no idea what to say, so he just went with a

Sent 4:47 PM  
Lol

That should be okay. Now, I should probably just inch my way back out of the conversation.

Sent 4:50 PM  
I should probably go. I have to feed my books.

Shit. Did I really just send that?

Received 4:53 PM  
Feed your books?

Real smooth Novak.

Sent 4:55 PM  
Oops I meant to say read. Read my books.

Received 4:58 PM  
...you go do that.

Sent 5:00 PM   
Bye.

Received 5:01 PM  
bye

Cas sighed and face palmed.

*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: Meanwhile*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:

Dean thumped his head on the wall of his bedroom.

He probably thinks I'm super creepy.

"Hey Dean?" Sam called from downstairs.

"Yeah, Sammy?" Dean yelled back, head still pressed against his wall.

"Is the oven supposed to be smoking or nah?"

"Jesus Christ Sam!" Dean ran downstairs to stop what could possibly end up being a house fire.

*:･ﾟ✧ ･: And now back to Cas *:･ﾟ✧ ･:

Cas just went downstairs to join his brother after the... we're gonna call it incident.

"Ayo baby bro!" Called Gabriel from the couch as he munched on potato chips and was surrounded by candy wrappers.

"Seriously Gabriel? Mom's gonna flip." Gabriel just smirked and held up one of those hand held vacuum thingies.

"That's what this is for." Castiel just rolled his eyes at his brother's antics.

"Just don't throw me under the bus if mom finds out." He walked over to his backpack. This year they were school issued, which was annoying because the school board can't design for shit.

The black backpack was bulky and heavy, and often Cas wondered why they even had them.

Nevertheless, he lugged the giant thing upstairs to his room. He shut the door quietly behind him and pulled out his sketchbook.

Drawing was his escape for when life didn't feel like living anymore, the sound of the pencil on paper was oddly therapeutic.

It was for when he had to wear long sleeve shirts, or when he had to fake his smiles, or when he wore hoodies to cover his face. Drawing transported him out of the cruel real world, and into one he could create himself.

What to draw... What to draw...

A single swipe of the pencil, then a few more, gave him a rough shape of a wing.

Many lines later he could see an angel and a man in chains. After a moments consideration he stood up to grab the colored pencils on his desk.

Cas kinda zoned out while drawing so he couldn't hear Gabriel shouting his name from downstairs.

"CASSIE!" Gabriel pulled open the door Cas had been leaning against.

"Ow! What the hell Gabriel!" Gabriel looked down and saw Cas rubbing the back of his head where it had made a hard thump on the floor.

"Oops. Sorry. But mom called."

Cas stood up while still rubbing his head and asked, "Yeah? What did she say?" Gabriel shrugged.

"She said you're a poopypants." And he ran off.

"GABRIEL!" Cas chased after his brother, leaving behind his drawing of an angel with blue eyes saving a man with green.

They ran downstairs and Cas grabbed a towel when they ran through the kitchen.

He started whipping Gabriel from behind while still running. "WHAT. THE. FUCK. DID. I. SAY. ABOUT. BOTHERING. ME. WHEN. IM. DRAWING?"

"Ow! Okay okay! I'm sorry Cassie!" Gabriel had turned around and put his arms up in defense.

Cas put down the towel and started to run back up the stairs.

"Oh! And Cassie?" Gabriel shouted.

"WHAT?" He yelled back down.

"Mom actually did call, she said uncle Uriel is bringing his kids by, so you might wanna tone down your gay for a little while."

"Fuck."

"No. No fuck. Like I said, reign your gay in."

"Shut up." Cas went up the rest of the stairs and shut his door.

He sunk down the door and took a deep breath. He grabbed his sketchbook and looked at the drawing.

It was him and Dean.

"Shit."


	6. Chapter 6

"Hey Gabe? Can I get a ride with you today?" Cas asked as he shoved his books into his backpack.

"Why not lil' bro?" Gabriel ruffled his hair and Cas huffed in annoyance.

The ride to the school was short, not leaving much time for small talk between the brothers.

As soon as they pulled up Cas jumped out of his brother's car.

"Be safe! Use protection!" Gabriel yelled after him.

"I don't know you!" Cas called in return.

———

Normally Cas liked Spanish. It was an easy class. He didn't have to talk to people, the work was simple, and there was a ton of fun activities. But today he found himself distracted.

It was his family coming.

His cousins weren't nice to put it nicely. They had never really been nice to Cas and, well, they were all very religious.

If they found out that Cas was gay, who knows what would happen.

He could guess. Probably a lot of screaming and hurtful comments in his direction. Then he would be disowned by his family and no one would talk to him again and- oh great, he could feel a panic attack coming.

He raised his hand. "Mr. Older? May I go to the bathroom?" The teacher nodded his head without even looking up from his notes.

Cas stood up from his seat and hurried to the nearest bathroom.

He locked himself in the farthest stall, sitting down and rocking back and forth.

He wasn't a stranger to panic attacks, he got them all the time. He just didn't tell anyone. He didn't know why, he could get help and maybe even get better, but he kept his mouth shut, fearing what others would say.

He felt tears running down his face and then he heard the bathroom door open.

Cas felt calm enough to leave the tiny stall, but waited until he heard the other person close their bathroom stall.

Cas walked out and looked at himself in the mirror, he looked terrible.

Tear stains ran down his cheeks and his eyes were bloodshot. Cas splashed some water on his face.

I'm fine.

He heard the sound of the bathroom stall opening and cursed himself.

"Cas?"

Of course it had to be Dean. Man, the universe is just really fucking with me today, isn't it?

He turned away from Dean.

"Hey." Oh god, his voice was so shaky. He heard Dean take a step towards him.

"Cas're you okay?" Cas turned his head to look back at concerned green eyes.

"Just fine." And he walked out of the bathroom.

(A/N: THIS CHAPTER WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPY GOD DANGIT)

Cas walked to art after he retrieved his things from Spanish. Charlie was waiting for him.

"What up Cassie bro?" She made it a tradition to come up with dumb phrases.

He just shrugged his shoulders and sat down. The happy look on her face faded to concern.

"What's wrong? What happened? Did those assholes hurt you again?" Cas sighed and shook his head.

"My cousins are coming up to visit." A look of understanding crossed her face and she patted his back solemnly.

"Wanna go get ice cream after school?" She asked kindly. He nodded his head.

———

Ms. Jackson was funny and probably one of his favorite teachers, but she was probably insane.

Cas thought this as he looked at his history teacher head banging to the Panic! At The Disco song blasting from her speaker.

She started to sing along.

"WOOOOOOOOAH! MONA LISA! YOU'RE GUARANTEED RUN THIS TOWN!"

Yep, she was definitely insane.

He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Dean looking at him.

"Yes?" Cas asked sharply, slightly annoyed for some reason.

"Are you okay? I saw you earlier and-"

"I'm fine." Cas cut Dean off, practically snarling. Dean raised his hands in a defensive manner.

"Okay. Got it." He pauses for a moment and puts his hands down, looking at Cas as if he were trying to find something.

"Do you wanna... come over to my house today? For the project, I mean." Cas hesitated for a moment.

"Sure. But I'm going for ice cream with my friend later, so maybe around like five?" Dean nodded his head.

"Five'll work. Cool." And he turned back to his work.

———

Cas had butterflies in his stomach, but they didn't feel like butterflies, more like angry bees.

I'm going to Dean's house today.

Their conversation kept playing through his head as he walked to Charlie's car.

The redhead was leaning against the yellow slug bug. She looked up and smiled at him.

"Someone's a lot happier. Did you win the lottery or something?" He chuckled and shook his head.

"Let's just go get ice cream."

The car ride sat in comfortable silence for about half of the drive until Charlie spoke up.

"Okay. Seriously. Why are you smiling like a cat that not only caught the canary, but marinated it in cream and garnished it with catnip?"

Cas smiled down at his hands.

"It's nothing."

"Bullshit. You were super depressed this morning and now you're giggling like a school girl with a- ahhhhh. It has something to do with Dean doesn't it?" She smirked at him.

His face flushed and he stuttered out, "What!? No!" She laughed.

"It totally does!" He folded his arms childishly and poured.

"Shut up." She raised an eyebrow then looked back at the road.

"Spill the beans Cassie." He sighed.

"We were assigned as partners for a history project and today he asked me to come to his house to work on it." She pulled into a parking space and took in a deep breath.

Cas knew what was about to happen and started to protest, "Wait! No-" a high pitched squeal echoed in the tiny car and Cas covered his ears.

"OH MY GOD CASSIE MY OTPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" Several people walking by looked around to see who was screaming and Cas was frantically trying to cover his best friend's mouth.

"I SWEAR TO GOD CHARLIE, IF YOU DO NOT SHUT UP IM NOT GOING TO MARATHON LORD OF THE RINGS WITH YOU THIS WEEKEND." That quieted her down.

They got out of the car and people were staring at them. Cas blushed and dragged his friend into the ice cream place, while she ignored the stares and kept gushing about his 'big gay crush'.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You must be Cas. Dean talks about you all the time. Name's Sam by the way. I'm Dean's younger brother. Is it true that-" Sam was cut off as Dean pushed him aside and put a hand over his brother's mouth. He laughed nervously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys see any grammar mistakes or plot holes let me know!

"Charlie." She kept talking.

"Ohmygod Cas you and Dean are gonna get together and it will be so romantic and..."

"Charlie."

"My otp will be canon and omg now I have to text Balthazar and we can plan your wedding..."

"CHARLIE." She stopped talking and glared at him.

"What?" She asked flatly. He leaned in close so as not to be heard.

"People are watching us." He whispered.

"Who cares? Let them!" Cas rolled his eyes and they finally moved up to the front of the line.

"What can I get you guys today?" A bright eyed boy sang from behind the counter. His name tag read 'Alfie'

Charlie spoke up. "Hi! I'd like the chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and he would like anything rainbows." Cas threw a glare in her direction but she either didn't see it or ignored it.

Once they had their treats they sat down at a small table by the window.

"Sooo, what time are you going to Dean's?" Charlie asked, smirking and scooping some ice cream onto her spoon.

"I said five, since I'm a good friend and wanted to get ice cream with you. I already texted my mom and told her I wouldn't be home until nine or ten."

She snorted.

"More like tomorrow morning." He punched her arm.

"Ow!" She rubbed it and pouted at him. He glared at her in return.

"I'm just going over there to work on a project, nothing more." He said that, but he kind of hoped something would happen between him and Dean, though Charlie didn't have to know that.

"And the sun rises in the west." She muttered and he hit her again.

———

Charlie was driving him to Dean's house and she wouldn't shut up.

"And the colors would be blue and green, just like your eyes! What about flowers? Maybe baby's breath? Ooh! How 'bout hydrangeas?!" Cas just stared straight ahead as his best friend talked on and on about his future gay wedding with Dean.

"I swear to god Charlie. I AM JUST GOING OVER TO HIS HOUSE, JUST ONCE, TO WORK ON STUFF FOR SCHOOL. THERE IS NO CHANCE HE EVEN SLIGHTLY LIKES ME BACK AND I WOULD APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WOULD SHUT THE HELL UP AND STOP PLANNING MY WEDDING."

The rest of the car ride was spent in tense silence.

She pulled the car up at Dean's driveway and Cas got out of the car, but before he shut the door he heard her call out, "Make sure to use protection!" He flipped her off and walked up the drive.

Once he reached the door, he checked his phone to see it was 4:50.

Not too bad. He thought.

When he knocked on the door a short boy with floppy brown hair answered.

"You must be Cas. Dean talks about you all the time. Name's Sam by the way. I'm Dean's younger brother. Is it true that-" Sam was cut off as Dean pushed him aside and put a hand over his brother's mouth. He laughed nervously.

"Hehe. Sammy why don't you go help mom with dinner." Sam glared at him and bit Dean's hand.

"Ow! Sam! What the hell!" Dean shouted at Sam. A female voice came from the kitchen.

"Watch your language Dean!"

"Sorry mom!" Dean called back.

(A/N: Yes Mary is not dead in this fic because I wanted Dean to have a healthy family life for once.)

Sam walked off to what Cas assumed was the kitchen and Dean gestured for him to come inside.

"This is a very lovely home." Cas commented, looking around the well kept living room.

"Thanks," Dean said, then jabbed his thumb in the direction of the stairs. "D'you wanna go up to my room? We could talk about the project up there."

Cas wanted to say they could technically talk about it anywhere in the house, but refrained from doing so because, well, he couldn't pass up the chance to see Dean Winchester's bedroom.

So Cas just nodded and the two boys headed up the stairs.

The first thing Cas noticed when he stepped into the room was the many classic rock band posters plastered all over the wall.

"Pink Floyd. Nice." Cas wasn't sure why he commented on that band in particular, he recognized all of the other bands and liked some a lot more than others but this certain poster stuck out to him.

"You a fan of classic rock?" Dean asked and Cas nodded.

"I like all kinds of music, helps me think." He wasn't lying. Music was another way for him to escape this crappy world.

Dean smiled at that and Cas decided he wanted to see that smile all the time.

"So... know anything about Ireland?" Cas shrugged.

"I know that I'm a quarter Irish and I should know way more than I actually do, since I read the Wikipedia page like seven times."

Dean snorted and said, "You're Irish?"

"Yeah."

"Well, no offense dude, but you don't exactly look or sound Irish."

"Since neither of my parents are directly Irish and the fact that I have never lived in Ireland I suppose I wouldn't have an accent. And what, pray tell, would you think an Irishman looks like?"

Dean shrugged. "I dunno, short, red hair, guards a pot of gold." He laughed at his own joke but Cas looked unamused.

"That is not at all what Irish look like. Only ten percent of Irish people have red hair. Plus, leprechauns are a myth."

"See? You know way more about Ireland than me!" Dean seemed to lighten up the mood even after Cas' blunt comment. Cas laughed a little bit, and he got to see Dean's smile again.

"Got any ideas?" Cas looked up thoughtfully.

"Well, if we're going to get an A, then we have to do something no one else is doing. She said a creative project, how much do you want to bet everyone's going to be doing a PowerPoint or a posterboard?"

Dean smirked. "I dunno Cas, I don't gamble." Cas laughed and Dean laughed along with him.

"Dean? Is your friend staying over for dinner?" Dean's mom called up.

Dean raised a questioning eyebrow at him and Cas nodded his head.

"Yeah, he's staying!"


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "See ya Cas." He watched Cas get into his brother's car and waited for them to drive away before he shut the door.
> 
> Dean rested the back of his head on the wood and sighed.
> 
> "Hey Dean! Rose Tyler called, she wants her title back as worlds biggest crusher!"
> 
> "I will put Nair in your shampoo again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And another chapter...

After about thirty minutes of joking around, Dean and Cas walked downstairs after being called to dinner.

Cas, being the socially inept and anxious person he was, awkwardly stood there until Dean gestured for Cas to sit next to him.

A pretty blonde woman came from the kitchen holding a plate of chicken.

The front door opened and closed but Cas couldn't see who came in. Just as Mrs. Winchester put down a pot of peas did a gruff man walk through the doorway of the kitchen.

He looked at Cas and said "Who's this?" It wasn't demanding or anything, just a question. A question that Dean opened his mouth to answer but his mom beat him to it.

"He's Dean's friend." She put extra emphasis on the word 'friend' for some reason but the man, who Cas assumed was Dean's father, nodded his head.

He sat down the same time as Dean's mom did. She served food to everyone on the table and when she dished some to Cas he said, "Thank you Mrs. Winchester." With a polite smile.

She waved him off. "Please, call me Mary." She said with a smile.

"So when did you two meet?" Dean made a choking noise next to him and Cas looked at him for a second before turning back to Mary and saying, "We were in the same sixth grade class actually."

Now Sam was choking, but Mary ignored her sons and keeps smiling.

"How long have you been together?" Now all three boys were choking and they thought damn, I need to stop eating when I know something surprising is going to happen.

Cas gathered himself before Sam and Dean before he blushed and stuttered, "We-We're not t-together!" while frantically gesturing between him and Dean. And he swore he could hear Sam mutter "You would be if Dean had balls." Under his breath before Dean kicked his brother under the table.

Mary shrugged and said, "That's a shame, you look so cute together." Dean hid his face in his hands and let out a muffled, "Let's talk about something else now."

Cas, who was blushing red enough to pass off as a lobster, nodded and stood up. "Where do I put my plate, Mary?" She smiled at his politeness.

"Just go put it in the sink, dear." He nodded again and walked into the kitchen.

*:･ﾟ✧ ･: Dean's Point Of View *:･ﾟ✧ ･:

Dean sat with his face on the table blushing up a storm as his crush walked into the kitchen.

"I think you look cute together too."

"Shut up Sam."

"No really, your children would be adorable." Dean kicked his younger brother under the table.

"Ow! I was just- Ow! Would you stop kicking me? Mom! This is sibling abuse!" She arched an eyebrow at Sam.

Cas walked back into the dining room and took his seat next to Dean again. The family bantered back and forth, Mary asked John how work was, Cas told a funny story from his childhood, and before they knew it it was 9:00 and Cas had to go home.

"Aw, man. We didn't even talk about the project." Dean said as he walked with Cas to the front door.

Cas smiled and shrugged. "That's okay. I had fun hanging out with you, we should do it again sometime." Dean's hearts sped up and his hand rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous habit.

Holy shit he wants to hang out with me more.

"Uh yeah. That'd be cool." Cas opened the door and saw his brother waiting for him outside. Gabriel honked the horn and Cas raised his hand to indicate he needed a minute then turned back to Dean.

"As for the project, we can just text each other ideas."

"Yeah, definitely." Gabriel honked the horn again.

"Sorry, I have to go. See you tomorrow Dean." He began to walk down the steps.

"See ya Cas." He watched Cas get into his brother's car and waited for them to drive away before he shut the door.

Dean rested the back of his head on the wood and sighed.

"Hey Dean! Rose Tyler called, she wants her title back as worlds biggest crusher!"

"I will put Nair in your shampoo again."

*:･ﾟ✧ ･:* Cas' Point Of View *:･ﾟ✧ ･:*

Cas sighed as he shut the door of the car.

"So. How was the date?" Gabriel asked. Cas blushed for what seemed the millionth time that day and turned to look out the window as his brother started to drive away from the Winchester's house.

"Shut up."

"What? Was it not fun?" Cas chuckled.

"It was good. I had fun."

Received 9:17 PM

What about finger puppets?

Cas chuckled.

Sent 9:17 PM

That sounds creative. Do you have the stuff to make puppets?

Received 9:17 PM

...no

Sent 9:18 PM

That's okay, I get my paycheck tomorrow, so we can just go buy stuff.

Received 9:18 PM

I love how you didn't even question how I came up with the finger puppet idea.

I love how you were crazy enough to suggest finger puppets. No, he couldn't say that.

Sent 9:19 PM

Would you like me to ask?

Received 9:19 PM

Nope. Tomorrow works tho, I can pick you up maybe?

Two days with Dean Winchester in a row, it must be Christmas.

Sent 9:20 PM

You have a car?

Received 9:20 PM

Yep.

Sent 9:21 PM

Sure, you can pick me up. I'll send you my address later.

Received 9:21 PM

Sounds legit.

"You're smiling like a pregnant lady rubbing her tummy. What up?" He barely heard Gabriel.

"Oh. Uh, school stuff."

"You're texting him again aren't you?" Cas nodded.

"Dude, you were talking to him face to face like, three minutes ago." Cas just shrugged and Gabriel sent a worried glance his way.

"Cassie, I know you're happy and everything, but I don't want you to get hurt again. Dean's a player, I don't want you to be just another one of his play toys." Cas grew angry.

"Whatever. It's not like he likes me back anyways. I'm too much of a weirdo."

"Yeah, but you're an attractive weirdo." Gabriel ruffled his brother's hair. Cas laughed and pushed his hand away.

"Gabe stop!" He smirked and turned on the radio, and Cas listened to the lyrics. Isn't that what people do? Listen to songs and try to relate it to their own life?

Oh, I can't fight this feeling any longer  
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow  
What started out this friendship has grown stronger  
I only wish I had the strength to let it show

I tell myself that I can't hold out forever  
I said there is no reason for my fear  
'Cause I feel so secure when we're together  
You give my life direction  
You make everything so clear

And even as I wander  
I'm keeping you in sight  
You're a candle in the window  
On a cold, dark winter's night  
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore  
I've forgotten what I started fighting for  
It's time to bring this ship into the shore  
And throw away the oars, forever

'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore  
I've forgotten what I started fighting for  
And if I have to crawl upon the floor  
Come crushing through your door  
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore

Cas leaned his head against the window and started to fall asleep, listening to the pitter patter of rain against his window.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean quirked an eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah? What kind of music do you like?" Cas shrugged.
> 
> "A little bit of everything. Except country, country can go burn in hell." Dean laughed and the easy silence sat in again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this when I read a really sad story and needed fluff to cheer me up sooo....

Cas had been buzzing with excitement the whole school day and he practically ran to his house as soon as he got off the bus.

He sprinted up the stairs and Gabriel poked his head out of his room. "Are you training for the Olympics or something?"

"Can't talk right now, gotta go fast."

Cas' phone buzzed.

Received 3:19 PM

You ready to go now? I'm not doing anything rn.

Sent 3:21 PM

Sure. My address is 221 B garrison street.

Received 3:22 PM

Got it.

Minutes later a honk came from outside. Cas ran, ahem, speed walked outside after saying a quick goodbye to his mom.

"That was fast." He said as he closed the door to the black car. Dean smiled and winked at him.

"You wanna know what else is fast?" Cas blinked. "I'm sorry, was that a flirtation?" Dean started driving away from the house, silent for a moment.

"If it was would you hold it against me?" Cas blushed but turned away to hide it.

I can think of something to hold against you.

"No. No I wouldn't."

Cas quickly turned on the radio to drown out the awkward silence. It was a twenty one pilots song.

Lean with it  
Rock with it  
When we gonna stop with it  
Lyrics that mean nothing  
We were gifted with thought  
Is it time to move our feet  
To an introspective beat-

Dean turned it to another station.

"Hey! I like that song!"

Dean quirked an eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah? What kind of music do you like?" Cas shrugged.

"A little bit of everything. Except country, country can go burn in hell." Dean laughed and the easy silence sat in again.

This is until Cas turned back the radio station.

The rest of the ride Dean and Cas were arguing over who got to choose the music.

"I'm not listening to that sullen emo crap!"

"It's alternative!"

"Emo!"

"Alternative!"

"Emo!"

"Dean, pay attention to the road godamnit!"

But by the end of the argument they were both laughing and Dean decided to let Cas choose the radio station, to which Sam would say later "God, you are so whipped."

They walked to the front of the Walmart and Dean opened the automatic doors with a wave of his hand.

He bowed and said, "After you fair lady." To which Cas did a pretend curtsy and replied, "Why thank you kind sir." In the same prestigious voice Dean had used.

They had made it to the crafts section after Cas had to pull Dean out of the home improvements area (basically hell) and Dean had to basically drag Cas out of the gaming area while listening to pleas of "But Destiny is on SALE!".

"What do we need for finger puppets?" Dean asked, looking at the array of cloth, popsicle sticks, glue, and many other things he had no clue what they were used for.

Cas came up behind him. "Well I've been doing research and I think we should make puppets of important figures in Irish history." Dean jumped at Cas' voice right next to his ear.

"Jesus! Are you a freakin' ninja or something?"

Cas rolled his eyes and grabbed some felt, scissors, and a sewing needle. "Alright, this should be what we need." Dean looked at the small amount of items in his hands.

"That's it?"

"Yes, this is it. Now I'm going to go pay for this, you can come along if you want." It took a minute for Dean's brain to catch up then he was hurrying after Cas.

"So are we actually going to work on the project or did you just drag me here so you could get a ride?" Cas looked up from the self-checkout and stared at Dean.

"I honestly didn't think that far. Would you like to come over?"

"Yeah Cas, I'd 'like to come over.'" Dean said, using finger quotes.

"Cool." Cas said, using finger quotes too. Dean laughed and put a hand on his face.

"That's not how it works Cas." Cas knew that, he just wanted to hear Dean laugh. 

 

They were joking around just as much on the way back home. Dean had said something that made Cas laugh just as they pulled up in front of his house.

Cas' smile faded as soon as he saw the two sleek black cars in the driveway.

"Um Dean?" Dean looked at him and his smiled faded too as soon as he saw Cas' expression.

"What's wrong."

"Uh, I don't think we can work on the project today. I'll uh, I'll text you." He hurriedly got out of the car with the grocery bag and waved goodbye to Dean, throwing in a quick fake smile to make it look convincing.

Then he turned and ran back into the house.

"Gabe?" Cas asked as soon as he had shut the door.

"In the living room!" Gabriel called back, his voice sounding strained.

He walked into the living room where his four cousins stood.

"Hello Castiel."


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas doesn't like his cousins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter :/

"Hello Naomi." Castiel said, biting his tongue to keep a bitter edge out of his voice.

He wasn't particularly fond of his overly-religious and extremely homophobic cousins, not just the four that were currently standing in the living room, but all of them. Family reunions were a nightmare.

Cas wasn't very fond of hearing their spiel about how "homosexuality" is "wrong" or "immoral" which he had to listen to ever time he saw them.

Of course it's also hard keeping the secret that you're the very thing they rally against.

So no, he didn't like his cousins.

"Well it's been so long since you've seen us, won't you give me a hug?" She said and Cas resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he walked toward her.

Now Cas was an awkward person, but he had never experienced a hug as weird as this one was. It was lingering, the body heat was all wrong, and was overall just uncomfortable.

Once he made it out of the clutches of his red haired cousin, he nodded to the three others.

Zachariah, white-haired and just an overall asshole who took joy in manipulating people and relishing in their pain.

Michael, twin of Lucifer and someone who believes in traditional everything. Seriously, the guy is so up tight you get a wedgie just looking at him.

And Lucifer, twin of Michael and lives up to his name. The guy raises hell wherever he goes, and generally just exists to piss people off.

"So how long are you guys staying?" Cas said, trying to sound nonchalant but obviously failing.

"Oh, so eager to get rid of us aren't you Cassie?" Lucifer said, evil grin creeping its was onto his features as Cas twitched at the nickname.

"Three days." Naomi said, obviously not impressed by her brother's antics.

Three days. That's not too bad.

Cas' phone chimed in his pocket. He took it out and opened the message.

Received 5:14 PM

Hey. R u ok? You seemed panicked earlier

He sighed and typed out his answer.

Sent 5:16 PM

I'm fine, just family stuff. I'd really not have you over when family is here.

"Who ya texting there Cassie?" Lucifer peered over his shoulder and Cas glared at him.

"My partner for a school project." He said in a cold, bitter tone that made him back up a bit.

"Lucifer, stop trying to get on Castiel's bad side." Michael said in an exasperated voice. Lucifer hmmphed and moved out of his personal space.

Gabriel stood up from the couch, putting on a fake smile to make it seem as if he actually wanted his cousins here.

"You guys look exhausted. Maybe you should go unpack, I'll show you the spare rooms if you'd like." Naomi nodded and the five walked out of the room, leaving Castiel alone.

He sat down heavily on the couch and sighed. He typed out a text to Charlie.

Sent 5:20 PM

Ugh, my cousins are here.

Received 5:21 PM

Omg are you okay?

Sent 5:23 PM

Yeah, I'm fine. I just hate being around them.

Received 5:25 PM

I feel ya. Gtg studying and all that.

Sent 5:26 PM

Okay, you go do that.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was so kind and brave. He was popular for a reason. No one dared to defy him. He was charming, making girls swoon left and right. Cas should have chosen someone to fall in love with that didn't already have a hoard of girls who would give their right hand to date him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Homophobic language

Cas sat down in his fifth period class, anxious to see Dean.

The green eyed boy walked into the classroom and took his seat next to Cas.

"Hey man, are you okay?" He asked, concern in his voice.

"I'm fine, just some family troubles. Sorry for running off on you like that." Dean nodded and turned to the front of the room, though Cas could see he still had questions.

It was hard not to stare at Dean Winchester. He was gorgeous, no matter what gender you are.

His face was dusted with freckles and Cas wanted to count every single one. His green eyes held flecks of gold among a sea of emerald, reminding Cas of the Wizard Of Oz for some reason.

His lips were kissable, and when he smiled Cas felt obligated to smile back. His sandy brown hair was just begging for a hand to run through it. Dean Winchester was perfect, but it wasn't just his looks.

He was so kind and brave. He was popular for a reason. No one dared to defy him. He was charming, making girls swoon left and right. Cas should have chosen someone to fall in love with that didn't already have a hoard of girls who would give their right hand to date him.

Cas felt fluttering in his stomach, it could have been because his crush of three years was sitting next to him, but something in Cas's mind told him he shouldn't have that happiness.

You don't deserve Dean. He shouldn't be worrying about something as useless as you. You are a waste of space.

His brain would say these things, put him down. It would try to destroy itself with thoughts.

He knew people loved him, he just didn't understand why. Just as soon as he felt happy the feelings of worthlessness would set in.

He felt like crying.

The lunch bell rang and he exited the classroom, heading straight to the cafeteria.

The lunch lines were always horrible, but today he walked through it like a zombie. Not fully conscious of where he was going or what he was doing.

Eventually he made it to his table, his friends laughing and joking with each other. Cas took his usual seat next to Charlie and smiled when he realized he could see Dean behind Kevin.

His smile however, dropped when he saw Dean flirting with one of the cheerleaders.

That's okay. I knew I would never be with him anyway, he's obviously straight as they come.

Charlie noticed his expression and put a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay?" He nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine." She followed his gaze and saw Dean right as the cheerleader gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"I feel a little sick. I'm gonna go call my mom to see if she can get me." He said. Charlie nodded and watched him stand up.

"Hope you get better okay?" He nodded and let a fake smile tug at his lips.

He waited at the front office and looked at his phone when it buzzed.

Received 12:16 PM

I can't get you but I sent Naomi over, she's going to pick you up. Hope you feel better <3

Naomi was coming to pick him up, that could be a problem. He just hoped Alistair and his gang weren't looking for some fun today.

He walked to the front of the school and looked for his cousin's black car.

Naomi was over 18, and she could move out, but she decided to stay to look after her younger siblings. She was always making sure they got to school and went to church on Sundays. She kind of took over the role of her mother.

The little black car pulled up and she got out of the car.

"Castiel! Are you ready to go?" He stood up from his bench and began to walk towards her as a voice called out behind him.

"Hey fag!" He winced at the word and began walking faster towards the car.

"I said, hey fag!" He reached the car and got in, his cousin staring at him.

"Let's just go."

There was ten minutes of tense silence until Naomi spoke.

"Are you a homosexual Castiel?" It was blunt, spoken with no emotion whatsoever. She kept her eyes trained on the road, not even looking at Cas.

"Yes." He almost whispered, afraid of what she would say next. Outed by bully, that's got to be on the top ten list of the worst ways to be outed to your homophobic cousin.

"You are not my family." Her words were short, but they cut deep. Castiel only nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat, fighting back tears.

When they made it back to the house, Naomi didn't even look at him. She marched inside with Cas trailing slowly after her.

The rest of his cousins sat on the couch talking to Anna, who must've come from the city to visit.

"Pack your things, we're leaving." Naomi spoke to her siblings. They all looked confused.

"Why?" Anna asked. Naomi sneered at her.

"Because your brother is disgusting and a disgrace to humankind. He deserves to burn." Anna glared at her and stood up.

"How dare you say such a thing about your own family."

"He is not my family." Cas felt the tears in his eyes but held them back.

"You are the one who is going to burn, Naomi. You have no right to attack him like this." Anna said, he voice raising.

"What is this all about?" Michael asked. Naomi turned to him and yelled.

"Castiel is a faggot!" They all stared at her, then looked to Cas.

"Well well well, I always knew you were a disgrace." Lucifer spoke up, waltzing into Cas' personal space. He grabbed his shirt and threw him against the wall.

"No!" Anna yelled, trying to get to her brother but Michael held her back.

"He deserves this." He said. Lucifer hit Cas in the stomach.

"Let this be a lesson to you." He punched Cas in his jaw then stood up.

"You are disgusting! I hope you rot in hell!" He screamed at him, then walked out the door with his siblings.

Anna was at his side in an instant, crying and looking at Cas' wounds.

"Cassie! Are you okay? Oh my god." Cas pushed her away and attempted to stand up. She immediately tried to help him but he waved her off.

"I'm fine, I've had worse." She pulled him into a hug.

"I can't believe they did that." He hugged her back and stroked her red hair.

"It's okay, I'm okay."


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So where you wanna eat?" Gabriel asked, still smiling, as he looked over to his brother. Castiel shrugged.
> 
> "The Roadhouse sounds good right now." Gabe nodded and pulled up to a red light. He turned the soundtrack on again and began singing along, louder this time.
> 
> He gunned it as soon as the light turned green, not seeing the car approaching from the right side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Graphic depictions of blood

Cas didn't go to school the next day. He texted Charlie what happened and when she offered to come over he said no. He didn't need more people worrying over him.

All his family was angry at what his cousins had done to him, when they offered to call the police he said no. It would just complicate things further, plus he was fine. He'd had worse done to him by the bullies at school.

He checked the time. It was about 6 PM. Gabe came into his room after knocking timidly.

"Hey Cassie. How you doin'?" Cas sat up on his bed, wincing a little from the bruises.

"I'm fine." Gabe raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. He spun his car keys around on his finger.

"I was gonna go for a drive and pick up food, wanna go with me?" Cas nodded and got out of bed.

He had gotten dressed earlier in the day so all he needed to do was hunt down his shoes.

He pulled on his favorite pair of black converse and looked up at his brother.

"Let's go."

——Switch To Dean——

"I don't see why you wanted to meet me here." Charlie said as she opened the door to the roadhouse, Dean following her inside.

"Well I don't really get to talk to you in school since we don't have any classes together." She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I swear to god Winchester, if this is a date I'll have you know I'm about as straight as a rainbow slinky." Dean laughed and shook his head.

"I know that, everyone knows that."

——Back To Cas——

"We're soarin'! Flyin'! There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach!" Cas laughed as his brother sang along to the Highschool Musical soundtrack.

"C'mon Cassie! Sing with me! Yeah we're breaking free!" Cas turned off the CD before Gabriel embarrassed himself even more.

"Aw Cassie, that was my jam!" Cas shook his head at his brother's antics.

"So where you wanna eat?" Gabriel asked, still smiling, as he looked over to his brother. Castiel shrugged.

"The Roadhouse sounds good right now." Gabe nodded and pulled up to a red light. He turned the soundtrack on again and began singing along, louder this time.

He gunned it as soon as the light turned green, not seeing the car approaching from the right side.

——Dean——

"So why did you invite me here, Dean?" He sighed and looked down at the scratched wooden table, worn from years and years of beer bottles and plates.

"It's about Cas." Her smile grew from cat that ate the canary to Cheshire Cat in seconds.

"You like him don't you?" He took a deep breath, about to protest but sighed once he realized Charlie had seen right through him.

"Yeah. Yeah I do."

——Cas——

It was all so slow. 

The car hit the passenger side door, sending the Nissan into a spin out. It was if time stopped after the hit.

Gabe merely hit his head on the window, putting him out of it.

It was if he was walking in molasses, so slow. It was a dream.

He fumbled with the door handle and got out of the car. Flashing blue and red lights blinded him.

Cas.

He turned to look at his brother inside the car.

Castiel was slumped sideways over the divider between the drivers and the passengers side. He had glass sticking out everywhere, his face coated in blood. It was all so red.

Cas' window was shattered, probably where the glass came from. Little white pieces littered his ebony hair, which was plastered to his forehead by blood. His eyes were closed and Gabriel couldn't see him breathing.

"Cassie!" He yelled. He got into the car again, trying to pull his brother out but he was stuck. The passengers door was dented and crushed in some places, trapping Cas inside.

He felt an arm pulling him.

"No! No that's my brother!" He was pulled out of the car.

"Sir. Sir you need to calm down. We'll get him out." The man pulled him over to an ambulance, a paramedic coming over to check out his wounds.

He cried out for his brother.

——Dean——

"How did you know I liked him?" Dean asked, taking a bite of his burger.

"Because he likes you too, idiot!" Dean stared, shocked.

"Are you serious? How long?" She snorted and rolled her eyes.

"Since, like, sixth grade dude. Get with the times!" He looked at her in disbelief.

She smirked and sipped her soda.

"So when you gonna tell him?"

——Cas——

It took them ten minutes to get the door off the car, but it felt longer. Eventually they had to saw the hinges off.

They pulled the blood soaked teen onto the road.

"No pulse! Get me a defibrillator stat!" A paramedic yelled. Gabe tried to go to his brother again, but was held back by officers.

"Cas!" Tears spilled from his eyes as he watched them cut his shirt open, trying to shock his brother back alive.

"Clear!" Shock.

"No pulse!"

"Clear!" Shock.

"No pulse!"

"Clear!" Shock.

——Dean——

"I was going to today, but he wasn't here." She frowned at that.

"What? Was he sick or something?" She shook her head.

"No. He got hurt when his cousins found out he was gay." Dean was shocked to say the least.

"Oh my god is he okay?" She shrugged.

"He says he's okay. I think he is, physically. He's had worse done to him by Alistair and his gang."

"What about other than physically?" She looked down.

"They said some pretty messed up stuff. I offered to come over but he said no."

"And you just let him off the hook like that?" She glared at him.

"Look, Dean. I know you care about Cas but you don't know him. When he wants you to leave him alone, you leave him alone." She said icily and Dean backed up a bit.

"Sorry. It wasn't my place to say that." He waved a waitress over.

"Can we get a check please?" He said, then winked at her. Charlie rolled her eyes and scoffed, standing up from the table.

"Unbelievable." She stomped away.

——Cas——

"Get a stretcher! We've got a pulse!" Cas was loaded onto the stretcher and rolled into an ambulance, Gabe stood up to follow him.

A paramedic stopped him but he looked at her pleadingly.

"Please. He's my brother." She nodded and let him climb into the vehicle.

——Dean——

"Charlie? Where are you going?" He called after the redhead, then threw a 20 on the table. He chased after her, ending up outside.

"What the hell, Dean? I thought you liked Cas! You called me over here, told me that you loved my best friend, then hit on the waitress? What the fuck?" Dean stared at her, eyebrows knitting together in confusion as he jabbed a finger back at the roadhouse.

"The waitress? No. I winked because I knew her. She's kinda like my cousin."

"Oh." Charlie's phone began to ring and she held a finger up to Dean.

"Hey Gabe, what's up?" Dean saw her face grow pale.

"What?" He eyes widened and she looked at Dean.

"Oh my god. W-where is he?" Her eyes began to water.

"O-Okay. We'll be there soon." She hung up, looking at Dean. He was afraid of what she might say.

"Cas was in an accident."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't kill me.

Charlie and Dean rushed into the ER, Gabriel ran up to them crying. He was bruised all over, but clean for the most part. He had some nasty cuts on his head that were bandaged.

"It's all my fault! I-I didn't see the car and-" Charlie grabbed his shoulders.

"Gabe. You need to calm down. Where's Castiel?" He swallowed thickly.

"He's in surgery right now. His heart stopped Charlie. His heart stopped and he was dead." She pulled him into a hug.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." He kept saying, but she just hugged him tighter and shushed him.

"Shh, Gabe, it wasn't your fault."

Castiel's parents bursted into the room.

"Where is he?" Chuck asked. Charlie calmly walked up to him and explained what was going on.

They all sat down heavily on the waiting chairs, all breaking apart inside. None of them knew if Cas was going to be alive when he came out of that operating room.

A nurse walked in with a grim expression on her face.

"Are Castiel Novak's parents here?" Chuck stood up, his wife following him. They all but ran over to her.

"Is he okay? Is he alive?" She gestured for them to sit down, which they did.

"Your son is alive but he's slipped into a coma. We aren't sure when or if he'll wake up." Chuck's wife began sobbing into his shoulder as he let tears of his own fall.

"I'm so sorry." The nurse said, she was being sincere. Gabe was looking at nothing, staring off into space as silent tears streaked down his face.

"It's all my fault."

Charlie looked at Dean with tears in her eyes, his expression was blank, but his eyes were filled with sadness. Carrying no tears but emotions.

It felt like a tidal wave was crashing into him, drowning him, filling his lungs up with water until he couldn't breathe. The wind was knocked out of him, like someone had thrown a bowling ball on his chest.

The nurse gestured down the corridor.

"Would you like to see him?" They all nodded and stood up.

Seeing Cas was even more heartbreaking. There were tubes everywhere, down his throat, in his arms, and countless other places. The heart monitor beeped loudly in the room, being the only sound since everyone was dead quiet.

It was only after seeing Cas that Dean began to cry.

Dean never cried. He considered it unnecessary, he never felt the need for it. Crying was an emotional thing, and Dean didn't do emotions. But seeing Cas like that, kind, innocent Cas who always made Dean laugh like they had been friends for years but was really only four weeks, look so vulnerable and small, finally broke Dean.

Tears spilled from his eyes as he walked towards the small hospital bed, reaching his hand out to touch Cas' arm.

"Hey." He said, his voice cracking. He tried to smile but the best he could get was a tiny tug at the corner of his lips.

He waited, waited for Cas to open his eyes and say 'hello' like he always did. For Cas to smile. For Cas to be okay.

But he didn't.

Dean turned around to Cas' family and stepped aside, letting them see their son/brother/best friend.

He walked out of the room and looked around. He needed to punch something. He let his fist connect with the wall and let physical pain join the emotional.

Dean sunk to the floor and rested his forehead against his knees, bringing his arms up to cover his head. 

"Who is he?" Chuck asked Charlie. She shook her head sadly.

"Cas loves him. He loves Cas. But Cas doesn't know that, and I don't know if he ever will." She walked out of the room and Dean looked up from his knees at her.

It was a while before he spoke.

"You may know him, but I love him." She looked at his bruised knuckles.

"Dean..." His green eyes filled with tears.

"Don't." It wasn't spoken harshly or angrily, just a soft plead. She didn't prod him more, just leaned against the opposite wall and ran a hand down her face.

"What time is it?" She asked, and Dean looked at his watch.

"It's 11:00 PM." Charlie sighed and pulled out her phone.

"I'm gonna call my mom to come pick me up. Or would you like to drive me home?" Dean shook his head.

"I'll stay here." She set her phone down on a side table holding a vase of forget-me-nots. Probably to attempt to dissipate the depressing atmosphere of the ER.

"Dean, you don't have to do that." He stood up, twisting out all the aches and pain that had come from keeping the same position for so long.

"But I want to." He looked into the window of Castiel's hospital room, seeing his parents standing over his bed crying, Gabriel sitting in the chair next to the bed.

It broke his heart, seeing Cas so limp and frail and so unlike the laughing cheerful person he was.

There was no smile or bright blue eyes Dean found himself getting lost in time after time. Like an ocean of blue filled with stars and never ending light.

There was no subtle head cock to the side whenever he was confused, no comment on how he didn't understand something. There was nothing, just beeps and tubes and bandages.

"I'm staying."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually found out that forget-me-nots stand for true love in flower language. I didn't even intend that when I was writing this.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Alright. Pinch me." Cas raised an eyebrow. Then pinched Dean's forearm.
> 
> Dean recoiled from the pain and let out a shout. He inspected the spot where Cas had pinched him then looked up in awe.
> 
> "You're real." Cas nodded.
> 
> "You're awake." He nodded again. Dean flew over and hugged him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh I just started bullshitting my way through this story at this point, but hey, Destiel.

It's been two weeks.

Two weeks since the crash and two weeks Cas had been in a coma.

Dean tried to carry on his daily life, to pay attention in school, get good grades, keep up with his friends. But it's hard.

He goes to the hospital everyday, sometimes stays overnight on the weekends, even though he's technically not supposed to. But the nurses understand, when they see him after visiting hours they give him a look of pity then pass by.

They had eventually moved Cas into a normal hospital room, since he was getting better, but he still wasn't awake. The doctors weren't much help. They just told Dean the same things over and over "just give it time".

So he did.

He waited everyday at Cas' hospital bed. Castiel's family didn't ask him questions. Sometimes Charlie or Gabriel would come in and sit next to him. Balthazar would be there on the weekends. 

Anna visited too, though Dean hadn't recognized her when she came in the second night. She cried, held her brother's hand, told him she was sorry. She didn't know who Dean was either.

His own family tried to get him to go back to life normally, tried to help him through, but he shook them off. He knew they were trying to get him better, but him doing things wasn't going to change the fact that Cas was laying motionless on a hospital bed. Sam pointed out that Dean tearing himself up about it wasn't helping either.

Dean didn't speak to him for days.

Sometimes he would talk to Cas, tell him stories about Sam and himself as kids. When he would fall asleep, head resting next to Cas' limp body, he would dream about Cas waking up.

He was always so happy in the dreams, his friend opening his eyes and saying "Dean?" In a confused voice that was a little gruff from not being used. Dean would laugh, or smile, or even cry.

Then he would wake up.

It was Friday, he sat in a plush chair next to the hospital bed, his backpack resting at his feet, his homework having already been completed. He sat back in the chair, letting his eyes skirt across Castiel's seemingly lifeless form.

Almost all of the tubes that had been connected to Cas on day one were gone, save for a few IV's. His eyes grew heavy as the steady 'beep's of the heart monitor lulled him to sleep.

———

Castiel's throat felt dry, like he hadn't had water for days. He tried to open up his eyes but it felt like they had been sewn shut. The song of a heart monitor shrieked in his ears.

He fought against unconsciousness and managed to get his eyes open, not that it made any difference, the room being pitch black and all. Except for a single beam of moonlight peeking through the blinds and illuminating a person in a chair.

"Hello?" He tried to call out, but his voice just came in a barely audible whisper. The person in the chair didn't move. Cas tried clearing his throat, nothing.

He looked around what he assumed was a hospital room and saw the faint outline of a lamp. He tried to move his right arm to turn it on but found it was heavily casted as well as his right leg.

How did I even get here?

He lifted his left arm and winced at the feeling of stitches pulling at his skin. Regardless, he finally managed to turn on the bedside lamp.

There was a faint groaning from the chair and a voice that said, "Yes, Amy, I know what time it is and no, I'm not going home."

That's Dean's voice. But why is he here of all places?

"Dean?" Cas asked, voice a little hoarse from lack of use. Dean's eyes snapped open and he lurched forward in his chair, then sat back again.

"You aren't real." These words made Cas confused.

Of course I'm real. Why would he think I'm not?

"Dean I can assure you I am most definitely real." Dean chuckled and closed his eyes again.

"Whatever you say dream Cas." Cas cocked his head to the side.

"What? Do you want me to pinch you? I can call in a nurse to come and confirm it if you'd like." Dean leaned forward in his chair. He held out his arm to Cas.

"Alright. Pinch me." Cas raised an eyebrow. Then pinched Dean's forearm.

Dean recoiled from the pain and let out a shout. He inspected the spot where Cas had pinched him then looked up in awe.

"You're real." Cas nodded.

"You're awake." He nodded again. Dean flew over and hugged him.

"Oh my god Cas this is amazing." Cas winced a little at the tugging on his stitches but wrapped his good arm around Dean nevertheless, relishing Dean's warmth.

Cas felt a wetness soaking into his cheap hospital gown and pulled away from Dean to look at his face.

Dean was crying a little, a few tears but not enough for him to start sniffing apparently.

"Hey hey, look, I'm okay." Dean sniffed and wiped some of the wetness off his face.

"It's really good to see you." Cas smiled and hugged Dean again.

"The feeling is mutual."


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie was next, having been called by the Novak's as soon as they got the news. She hugged Cas briefly before pulling back and slapping his uninjured arm.
> 
> "Ow!"
> 
> "Don't you dare fucking scare me like that again." She received a brief "Language." From Mrs. Novak before stepping aside to let his parents fuss over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Doctor who references and happiness

"As much as I love hugging you Dean, I am going to need to breathe at some point." Dean pulled away hastily and cleared his throat.

"Sorry." Cas smiled, his eyes crinkling in that endearing way of his.

"Don't be." Cas said, then looked around the room.

"How did I even get here?" Dean raised an eyebrow and said, "An ambulance?" As if it were obvious. Cas rolled his eyes.

"No, I mean why am I in here?" Dean's face switched from confusion to worry. "You mean... you don't remember?" Cas shook his head.

"What was the last thing you remember?"

"I remember going to school on Thursday and it's all black from there." Dean nodded and bit his lip, something he did when he was concentrating.

"We should... we should probably call in a doctor." Cas nodded and pressed the 'page nurse' button.

———

A few minutes later a nurse with maroon scrubs and bright red hair came storming and said, "Dean you cannot keep pushing that button for me to get you tater tots." In a Scottish accent before seeing Cas, awake and sitting up with Dean.

Her eyes widened before saying, "You're awake," Cas nodded. "I need to go get the doctor." And she walked out of the room.

"Who was that?" Cas asked after turning back to Dean, who shrugged.

"Her name is Amy, we've grown to be aquatinted over time. She brings me tater tots on Fridays."

Amy came in with the doctor minutes later, and the doctor smiled at the sight of Cas up and talking.

"Ah, Castiel. It's good to see you finally awake." He said, straightening his bow tie. Cas tilted his head.

"How long have I been asleep?" He asked.

"Two weeks." Cas' eyebrows furrowed together.

"Two weeks? Is my family okay? I want to speak to them." But the doctor just smiled.

"All in good time. Now tell me, what do you remember about the accident?"

———

After extensive questioning by the doctor, they had diagnosed that he had slight amnesia along with a concussion, five broken bones, and a hell of a lot of bruises.

His family was called to let them know he was awake. When they made it to the hospital they had rushed to his hospital room, Gabriel holding Cas in a tight but loving hug for two minutes before Cas tapped his arm and wheezed, "Can't. Breathe...". Only then did Gabe reluctantly release him.

Charlie was next, having been called by the Novak's as soon as they got the news. She hugged Cas briefly before pulling back and slapping his uninjured arm.

"Ow!"

"Don't you dare fucking scare me like that again." She received a brief "Language." From Mrs. Novak before stepping aside to let his parents fuss over him.

"Mom. Dad," he said after they kept repeating over and over about how 'worried they were' and 'glad that you're awake' "I'm fine." His mom smiled and kissed his forehead.

Dean hung back from the reunion, leaning against the doorframe. Charlie walked over to him and murmured, "You gonna tell him?" Dean shook his head.

"Not yet, he's got enough going on right now." He smiled as Cas laughed at one of his brother's jokes.

Not yet, but definitely sometime.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes the people you love don't come back." Cas said, a hint of question in his voice. Dean sat forward in his chair, inches away from Cas.
> 
> "Mine did."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe, making out. (and poetry, which is not mine. Credit to the authors.)

It took a few days, but Cas was finally told by the doctor he could go home tomorrow.

He was extremely excited and anxious to get his school work done. He wasn't very happy being three weeks behind in his classes. But his mom just ruffled his hair and said, "You'll get it all in, you always do."

It was a Thursday, and he had been reading a poetry book his grandma had given him when she visited along with his grandfather. He let his fingers glide over the words on the freshly printed page, deciphering their meaning as he read.

Longing

Or, as thou never cam'st in sooth,  
Come now, and let me dream it truth,  
And part my hair, and kiss my brow,  
And say, My love why sufferest thou?

Come to me in my dreams, and then  
By day I shall be well again!  
For so the night will be more that pay  
The hopeless longing of the day.

Cas didn't know why but he thought of Dean. It was a pleasant surprise when he had woken up to Dean by his bedside. Charlie had said it sounded like a love story and Cas hit her arm because "Dean is in the next room Charlie!"

He was soon jolted from his thoughts by a tentative knock on the doorframe. Cas looked up and saw Dean smiling and strolling into his room. Cas smiled back and put a bookmark in his book, setting it on the tiny bedside table.

"Hey." Dean said, taking a seat on the badly padded hospital chairs — Cas couldn't believe he had slept in those for two weeks — and pulled it closer to the bed.

"Hello Dean." Dean eyed the book Cas had set down.

"What'cha readin'?" Dean asked and Cas lifted the book carefully.

"Poetry, my grandparents stopped in to give it to me." Dean smiled and laughed.

"Should have known you were a poetry nerd, Cas." Cas loved it when Dean smiled, how when it was really there, his whole face would radiate happiness. The smile wasn't just in his mouth, it was in his eyes and freckled cheeks and his shoulders would even shake a little with silent laughter.

Cas smiled back and Dean grabbed the book from the tiny table and opened it up to where Cas had been reading.   
"You reading one of those love poems Cas?" He asked. Cas smiled and shook his head fondly, taking the book from Dean.

"Not all poems are about love and happiness, you know." He said and Dean arched an eyebrow. "Oh really? Then read me something that isn't." Dean challenged and Cas turned to one of his marked pages.

"I dreamt of ashes last night.   
I was a paper boat and you were my sea of flames.   
I woke in pain and tears.   
The sheets were cold and you were not here.   
Oh, I dreamt ashes last night."

Dean scoffed, "No way, that's totally about love."

"It's about loneliness, Dean." Dean shook his head and smiled.

"Well there may be loneliness for a while, but then the person comes back." Cas sat up farther and leaned closer to Dean, searching for something in his eyes.

"Sometimes the people you love don't come back." Cas said, a hint of question in his voice. Dean sat forward in his chair, inches away from Cas.

"Mine did."

Neither of them were sure who closed the distance, but they knew that they were kissing and it felt right. Cas moved his hand up to cup Dean's face while Dean moved his hand to Cas' forearm, now out of its cast.

When they had to break apart for breath, Dean and Cas stared into each other's eyes, green and blue mixing like the clear blue sky touching the vivid green grass. Cas laughed and pecked Dean's lips again.

Charlie and Gabriel walked into the room and Charlie whooped triumphantly.

"Woo! Five bucks Gabe!" She held out her hand expectantly. He begrudgingly took his wallet out of his back pocket and handed her the bill.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Why am I not surprised?" Cas' head whipped back and forth between Dean and his best friend.

"Wait, you bet on us?!" He asked Charlie, pointing at her accusingly. She nodded and laughed.

"Yep! Gabe bet me within a month and I said a week."

"And I totally would have won if it wasn't for this meddling little shit." Gabriel grumbled and gestured at Charlie, who laughed.

"Anyyyywho, we'll leave you two alone." And she pulled Gabe with her out of the room. Cas turned his gaze back to Dean.

"What did you mean by 'why am I not surprised'?" He asked. Dean's arm moved to scratch at his neck, a nervous habit.

"Uhh, nothin'." Cas arched an eyebrow as if to say 'that's a lie and we both know that'

"I may have sort of..." Dean covered his mouth with his fist and mumbled "invitedCharlietodinnertotellherIwasinlovewithyou." very quickly.

Cas' mouth contorted into a shit eating grin and lifted his hand to his ear.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you correctly. Could the manly man Dean Winchester have just said he was in love with me?" Dean shoved Cas playfully.

"Shut up." Cas grinned knowingly.

"You know you love me." Dean smiled and pecked Cas' lips again.

"Yeah, I do."


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas stood up and called after him, "Dean, wait!" Dean turned back to see Cas taking off the hoodie he had borrowed from his boyfriend—boyfriend, that sounded nice— Dean waved a hand dismissively.
> 
> "Keep it, you can just get it back to me tomorrow." Cas smiled wider.
> 
> "Alright. I'll see you tomorrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ms. Jackson is my fav character.

"I win" Cas said, for the fifth time that night. Dean threw his controller at him while Charlie and Gabe sighed.

"Let's play a different game." Dean huffed. Gabriel laughed.

"Too embarrassed about your boyfriend kicking your ass? I told you not to underestimate him, he's scarily good at mariokart." Dean rolled his eyes and pulled his phone out when it buzzed.

"Aw man, my mom wants me to get home." He stood up and gave Cas a kiss on the cheek.

"See ya at school tomorrow." Cas smiled and Dean started to walk out, grabbing his keys.

Cas stood up and called after him, "Dean, wait!" Dean turned back to see Cas taking off the hoodie he had borrowed from his boyfriend—boyfriend, that sounded nice— Dean waved a hand dismissively.

"Keep it, you can just get it back to me tomorrow." Cas smiled wider.

"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow."

 

Tomorrow

 

Castiel walked into the school the following morning wearing Dean's hoodie. He was met with stares and people turning to whisper into other's ears.

He used his crutches to get down the hall, looking left and right at the people snickering in his wake, but smiled when he saw Dean leaning against his locker looking at his phone.

Dean looked up and smiled in return.

"Hey baby." Dean said, and walked over to plant a soft kiss on Cas' lips. Cas melted into it for a moment before he put a hand on his boyfriend's chest.

Dean pulled away with a worrying look on his face.

"What is it?" Cas furrowed his eyebrows.

"You sure you want us to be outed yet?" Dean laughed.

"Cas. You're already out to the whole school and a lot of people know I'm bi, why should we keep this a secret?" Cas looked around at the people around them who were whispering and some of them already had their phones out.

"Well, I guess there's no going back now." Dean chuckled and pulled him in for another kiss. 

Classes were now boring without Dean, and since Cas didn't have homeroom today that meant he had to wait even longer to see him.

Wait, shit. They had only been together a week and Cas was already clingy. Nevertheless, his face lit up when he saw Dean in his history class, and Dean's blinding smile told him the feeling was mutual.

"Hey." Dean said, patting the seat in front of him.

"Hello." Cas dumped his backpack under his seat and turned around in his seat to face Dean, who booped his nose.

"Did you just- Did you just boop me?" Cas asked, amusement hidden under disbelief. Dean laughed and nodded.

The bell rang and Cas turned back around in his seat, but not until he booped Dean back.

Ms. Jackson walked into the classroom.

"Happy Monday. How was everyone's weekend?" The rest of the class excluding Dean and Cas groaned.

"Me too." She looked at all her students and when she saw Cas she smiled.

"And welcome back Castiel." People around him applauded, for what reason he had no idea, so he just smiled and waved awkwardly.

She clapped her hands together and started pacing around the classroom again.

"Who wants to learn about Europe?"

The class groaned again.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie goes on a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a Charlie Chapter, enjoy.

Dorothy Baum. One of the most beautiful girl Charlie Bradbury has ever had the misfortune of seeing. 

She was funny, kind, smart, strong, pretty, and overall just a really popular girl. Everyone loved her, which is why Charlie hated her. 

Sometimes while walking in the halls, Dorothy would call out or compliment Charlie (She seemed to know everybody's name too. Creepy if you ask Charlie) The compliments usually went along the lines of, "I love your binder!" Or "Your hair looks great today Charlie!" Ugh, so annoying. 

That day while Charlie was walking in the halls next to Cas, Dorothy spotted her. 

"That's a really cool shirt, red!" And walked away. 

"You're a shirt..." Charlie mumbled. 

"Who was that?" Cas asked and she rolled her eyes. 

"Just some annoying chick." He did the head tilt thing and looked behind him to see if he could spot Dorothy. 

"Really? She seemed like your type, and she was totally into you." Charlie scoffed and stopped at her locker. 

"Please. She is so not my type. Even with her dark brown hair, honey eyes, sweet but snarky smile..." she trailed off wistfully. 

Cas gave her an unamused look. "You're drooling." She wiped a hand across her mouth. "Shut up. We can't all have super hot and popular boyfriends."

"But you don't like boys." He said, honestly sounding confused but the guy was so innocent Charlie doesn't even know anymore. "You know what I meant." She spotted Dean coming up from behind Cas. 

"Speak of the devil and he shall appear." She said with a smirk. Cas turned around and Dean pulled him in for a kiss, which he happily reciprocated. 

"Ewwwwww! PDA!" Charlie cried jokingly. Dean just flipped her off and continued kissing Cas. She sighed and swept the rest of her books into her bag. 

"I'm gonna leave you two gay lovebirds alone." Cas waved her off and she laughed.

With her hands in her pockets she walk down the crowded hall of teenagers. There was a guy with bright blue hair talking to Dorothy. Wait, nope nope nope nope. I'm not looking for her. Shit what's happening to me?

"Oh. Hey Charlie!" Dorothy called. 

Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. 

Charlie tried to keep her head down but ended up looking up and giving a tight smile in Dorothy's direction. The brunette girl walked over towards her, a confident stride. 

"Would you like to have dinner with me on Friday?" Charlie was taken aback by Dorothy's forwardness, but found herself nodding and stuttering out "O-okay." Dorothy smiled and walked back to her friends. 

Charlie hurried down the hall now, ducking around the corner to catch her breath, then she smiled. She twirled around in happy circles. 

I've got a date with Dorothy Baum! She kept chanting over and over in her brain. She already started going over what should she wear, where they would eat, what to do afterwards, before she realized that she didn't even have Dorothy's phone number!

No biggie! I'll just.... uhhh... ask for it at lunch! But that of course meant that Cas would find out and tease her about it. She would just have to hope and pray Dorothy will realize the same thing and stop her in the hall or something.

— Friday —

"Hey Charlie!" Charlie looked up from her food to see Dorothy's smiling face. 

"Oh, hey Dorothy!" She smiled and ignored Cas chuckling behind her. 

"I was thinking last night and I realized I didn't even have your phone number! Would you mind telling me so we can work out the details for dinner?" Cas snorted and Charlie - again - just smiled and ignored him. 

"Sure. It's 212-479-7990." (Call that phone number it's hilarious, but obviously it's a real phone number in this circumstance)

"Thanks! See you tonight, red." Dorothy gave her a wink before walking off. 

Charlie hmmmed and turned back to her plate, smiling even wider when she saw Cas and Dean with their jaws dropped watching her. 

"Queen got game." Dean said, and the whole table erupted into laughter. 

 

Received 7:00 PM

You ready?

Sent 7:01 PM

Yeah. Are you outside?

Received 7:01 PM 

Yeah. Now get your fine ass out here. I'm hungry. 

Charlie laughed and smoothed out the only fancy shirt she had one last time, doing a little spin in the mirror. 

Satisfied with her outfit she grabbed her purse and walked out the door. A motorcycle revved its engine and Charlie spotted Dorothy smiling brightly at her. 

"Get on!" Charlie laughed and got on the back of the bike after putting on the spare helmet (safety is important). 

"Hold on tight!" Dorothy yelled over the sound of the engine. Charlie wrapped her arms around the other girl's waist and they were off. 

 

Later, Charlie and Dorothy walked out of the Bowling Alley (the one that serves food) laughing and smiling at each other. 

"Who knew you were a gamer! I thought you were just a really nice popular girl who was completely normal!" Charlie exclaimed. 

Dorothy laughed. "I get that a lot. It seems no one really takes the time to get to know me." She shrugged and put her hands in her pockets. 

"What? I thought you had tons of friends!" Charlie exclaimed. 

"I do. Just no close friends." Dorothy smiled sadly. "Y'know, I think you have it the right way around. You may not have very many friends, but their all close. It's better to have a few close friends rather than a ton of friends you barely know." Charlie bumped Dorothy's arm and she looked up. 

"Well. I, for one, would love to get to know you better." Charlie smiled sincerely.

"Yeah. I'd like that too."


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas chapter uwu

Cas leaned his head against Dean's shoulder as they walked down the street. 

"It's so fucking cold." He complained. Dean chuckled and wrapped an arm around his boyfriend. "That better?" He asked. Cas tried to nestle even closer to Dean, who laughed again. 

"Don't worry, it's not far from here." Cas rolled his eyes then closed them. 

"That's what you said five minutes ago." He whined. A tiny snowflake landed on Dean's nose and Cas brushed it off with his thumb. 

"Stop being a whiny bitch, c'mon. My mom is going to be mad if we're late." Dean dropped his arm around Cas and reached for his hand instead. Cas huffed at the loss of warmth, but took Dean's hand all the same. 

"I don't know if I can make it, you'll have to carry me." Cas made a pouty face at him and Dean raised an eyebrow. 

"You sure you want me to carry you through the front door, bridal style, the first time we have Christmas together as boyfriends?" Cas looked up thoughtfully and smiled. 

"That does sound nice," he said thoughtfully, but upon seeing Dean's 'are you fucking serious' face he added, "but I guess I'll suffer for you." Dean shook his head fondly and observed Cas, who was wearing a heavy black coat, skinny jeans, and a pair of converses. His hair was turned ebony by the almost ethereal glow the lamp posts seemed to cast on him, along with little white snowflakes gathered on his head. 

His eyes seemed almost an unnatural blue, which stood out in contrast to his slightly pale face. His cheeks were rosy from the cold. Dean could never understand how he looked so ethereally beautiful, yet like an adorable puppy at the same time. 

"God I wanna kiss you right now." Cas smirked at him. 

"Then what's stopping you?" He asked suggestively. Dean pointed off to the left with a bored expression without looking away from Cas. Castiel looked over and saw Sam waving excitedly at them. 

"Oh. That." Cas muttered. Dean nodded and sighed. 

"Well, come along then." Dean led him inside the house. 

 

The Winchester household, even though Cas had been here a multitude of times over the last few months, seemed different from when he was here just the other day. It seemed to be a lighter, happier atmosphere from before. That's Christmas for you. 

He could hear Christmas music coming from... somewhere. There was an amazing smell drifting from the kitchen, probably Christmas dinner.

"Cas! Get in here!" Dean called from the kitchen. Cas smiled and made his way into the aroma filled room. 

"Hello Castiel." Mary smiled brightly at him. "I'm so happy you could make it. 

He looked over to Dean, who was arguing with his brother about who got to lick the spoon Mary had been using to make brownies. "There isn't anywhere I'd rather be."

 

After dinner, Dean and Cas laid down on his bed. Dean, although he'd never admit it, was snuggling up to Cas, his sandy brown hair tickling his nose. 

"Ugh. I think I ate too much." Dean groaned. Cas just planted a kiss on Dean's head and closed his eyes. 

"I want to take a nap." He said, voice laced with tiredness. He shot up suddenly, much to Dean's dismay. 

"Nooooo, lay back down and sleep. You're waaaaaaarm." Cas laughed at his boyfriend's antics. "Sorry baby. I forgot to give you your present." Dean sat up and rubbed at his eyes. 

"How the hell did you bring a present here without me seeing it?"

"I'm a ninja." Cas shoved a small box with a delicate white bow into Dean's hands. "Now open it, cmon!" Dean rolled his eyes at him and untied the ribbon. 

Taking off the top of the box, Dean pulled out a necklace with a pair of silver wings on the end. Cas blushed. "You don't have to wear it if you don't want to." Dean pulled the chain over his head, letting the wings rest against his chest. 

"I love it. Thanks." Cas smiled and Dean kissed him sweetly, only to be interrupted by Sam yelling, "Dean! Gabe is here to pick up Cas!" Dean sighed. 

"To be continued." He said distantly. 

Gabriel's loud obnoxious voice came from downstairs, "Y'all better both still be virgins by the time you get down here!" Cas laughed. 

"Guess that's my cue to leave." He stood up and Dean followed. "I'll walk you out." Cas smiled and they walked hand and hand down the stairs. 

Once they were in the front doorway, Dean kissed Cas once again. "Merry Christmas, Angel." Sam groaned. 

"Any more of that and you'll grow a vagina." Dean glared at his little brother and hugged Cas. 

"See you soon, Dean."

"Yeah, bye Cas." A loud honk of the horn and a shouted "I'm coming!" And Cas ran back to his brother's car. 

He saw Cas wave through the car window and waved back. He waited until the car was out of sight and closed the front door. He leaned back against the wood and sighed.

"You're such a girl Dean."

"Shut the fuck up Rapunzel."


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Do you remember this place?" Dean asked and Cas 'hmm'ed an affirmative response. 
> 
> "It was where we had our first date. Of course, that was like what? Seven years ago?" Dean laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the very last chapter.

7 years later (give or take)

"Mmmm, baby we need to get up." Dean groaned and rolled over. Cas nudged him with his foot. 

"Ah! Cold!" Dean shoved at his boyfriend and finally opened his eyes. A pair of irritated blue ones glared back at him. 

"Exactly. Go turn on the furnace, it's freezing." Dean rolled his eyes and sat up, the comforter pooling around his hips. He was stretching out his muscles, mostly just to irritate Cas, when he was pushed out of the bed and onto the floor. 

"Asshole." He mumbled, and stood up. When he looked back at the bed he saw that Cas had moved to the spot where Dean had occupied. His face was buried in the pillow with his fuzzy dark brown hair sticking up in all sorts of weird places. He was curled up in a way that Dean Winchester would never admit he found cute. He's a grown man for god's sake.

Dean walked down the hall towards the thermostat, turning on the heat. "There you go, your majesty! Us humble servants are glad to be of service!" He called towards the bedroom. 

"I'm glad you finally came to your senses, peasant!" Cas' voice drifted back from their shared room. Dean shook his head fondly and made his way towards the kitchen.

He quickly throws together some eggs and bacon, then calls down the hall to Cas. "Breakfast!"  Minutes later a grumbling, messy haired Cas stumbled into the room and seats himself at the table. 

God, I love him so much. 

Dean set a plate in front of him, and Cas grunted out a thank you in return. Satisfied with his cooking, Dean retreated down the hall into the bedroom. 

He opened his sock drawer, reaching into the very far back left corner and pulling out a small box. 

Today's the day. He thought. 

"Hey babe?!" Dean yelled. 

"Yeah?" Came Castiel's response. 

"Wanna go out tonight?" 

"Um. Sure!" Dean smiled and shoved the ring back into the drawer. 

—That Night—

"I always forget how beautiful this place is." Cas says, looking around at the fountains surrounding them. Dean smiles and looks at the fluorescent lights that make the water glow. 

"Yeah, it's really nice." He fumbles again with the little box in his pocket. It was like a fifty pound weight had been slipped into his jacket by the magic commitment elf of 'do you really want to do this?'  

Just a little further. Up ahead is his favorite fountain. 

"Are you okay? You look a little tense." Dean looked over at his boyfriend and squeezed his hand reassuringly. Cas smiled and leaned his head on Dean's shoulder. 

"Do you remember this place?" Dean asked and Cas 'hmm'ed an affirmative response. 

"It was where we had our first date. Of course, that was like what? Seven years ago?" Dean laughed. 

"To the minute almost." Cas' eyes glittered as he looked back at the sparkling fountain.

"Yeah, I remember. September 28th, 2015. You kissed me right in front of this fountain. Then it started raining and you walked me home." He looked back at Dean. "It's one of my best memories." Cas sat down on the concrete wall that bordered the fountain, Dean joined him without a second thought. 

"I hope I can top it." He laughed and pulled the ring out of his pocket, lowering himself down onto one knee. 

"Castiel James Novak. When I was just barely 12 years old I met you for the first time, I didn't know it then, but I was already falling in love with you. Now, in the ten years I've known you, not once have I doubted you. 

I'd probably be lost without you, just one little minnow swimming around in a massive ocean. You're my best friend, my angel, my partner in crime, and whatever else you like to call it. Now, I'm not big on the whole 'romantic' thing, but I love you. More than anything else in this world. So, will you marry my dysfunctional ass?" Cas stared at Dean, speechless. 

"You asshole." Dean was shocked. 

"W-what?" Cas rummaged through his messenger bag and pulled out a little black box almost identical to Dean's. 

"You beat me to it." Dean stared at the box, then laughed. Cas joined in and their sides eventually began to ache from their loud guffaws. 

"So... does this mean you'll marry my emotionally constipated self?" Dean asked and Cas shook his head fondly. 

"Only if you'll marry mine." He replied. 

"Deal."


End file.
